I don’t know what it is. Maybe it is being holed up in a steamy residence room surrounded by my own mess and piles of reading. Or yearning for my thrilling undergraduate years. Or maybe it’s just good old fashioned home sickness. Whatever it is, it is freaking the shit out of me.

I MISS MONTREAL COLD.

That’s right. I said it. I would love to be freezing my ass off in -40 degrees celsius weather. Wind whipping right through the layers of synthetic material, down, wool, cotton, skin, blubber, muscle and chilling me to the bone.

I would love to feel all that while rushing to meet my friends at the cinema to catch the latest and greatest film out on the big screen. If my Julia side were dominating, we’d be at Cinema du Parc catching the screening of 2046. If my Hayden side was feeling stronger, we’d be at the AMC Forum, catching In Her Shoes and bitching about the casting of Toni Collette as Rose and Cameron Diaz as Maggie.

I can almost feel the icy air pinching my cheeks and that signature teary streak running down my left cheek…I brace myself against Dave in the wind and concentrate on the sidewalk, avoiding slippery patches and other obstacles in my impractical super high black leather Aquatalia boots. I am careful not to drag my too long, but oh-so-perfect favourite Miss Sixty dark denims into the slush; but inevitably, they succumb to the salt.

There will be no such meetings this winter. Nobody will be in Montreal in December. We’re scattered around the world: Asia, Europe, opposite ends of Canada. These new adventures are enriching. I’d even go so far to call them thrilling; and yet, I am extraordinarily sad.

This is one major reason why last year’s crunches were so painful. No one with whom to freak out in McLennan. Nobody to save me from throwing myself under the study room table. No one with whom to grab a quick bite before heading back into the land o’ geek.

I guess it is not the winter that I miss. It’s not even winter back home yet. Winter’ll be there to bite me hard in the ass when I return to Canada in December. Surely, I am not looking forward to wintry dreariness in Downsview.

I do miss the changing of the seasons, though. I would love to take a walk in the ravine with my parents, inhaling that crisp autumn air and noticing yet another tree turned red/orange/yellow.

Clearly, it’s not just the weather. I’m feeling terribly nostalgic. Oh crazy McGill days, how I pine for you. But it can’t just be nostalgia. I think I might be a bit homesick. I miss my peeps!

ETA: I called Julia tonight and though it was damn expensive, it was worth every penny. My “free” long distance calls to Dave in the U.S., my parents in Canada or Jules in Taiwan still cost me $.22 a minute. That’s why Dave and the ‘rents always call me. (Yes, I am spoiled, but not rotten.) I had to call Julia, though. I feel much better having giggled and groaned with her.

I also was lucky enough to have another slump busting phone conversation with Dave who was calling me for the second chat of the day. I feel bad that so much of his stipend is spent on phone bills, but we’d both lose our minds without these daily calls, so we’ve agreed that it is worth every penny. It’ll be my turn to call again once I’m back in the T-dot using our fabulous family long distance plan. Thankfully my mother doesn’t make snarky comments when the phone bill comes and she sees that Dave and I talk for several hours a day. She’s nice like that.

Because of my slothy nature today, I didn’t make it to the Lantern Safari with Alison and Omar as I had planned. I’m going to try to set a tighter schedule tomorrow so we can do that in the evening as it is our last chance to go!

I know myself well. I just have to let go of this crap and get cracking. Tomorrow’s dim sum at the famous Crystal Jade at the Paragon with my lovely relatives will definitely help take the edge of a little bit. Then it’s buckling down till Lantern Safari fun.

In other news, my parents are about to head off on one of their cruises. Even though I’ve been doing a fair amount of travelling in recent months, I’m jealous of their upcoming trip since they’ll be spending a day on the island of Tenerife! They’ll be visiting with their Spanish daughter and exchange sister, Diana, who lived with us during the Canadian leg of our exchange. They’ll also finally get to meet my Spanish family who put up with me during my time in their charming Canarian town, Candelaria.

Oh no, I’m going to start reminiscing about that now too! No. I have to save that for another day. I haven’t even told you my Malaysian Borneo stories yet. I definitely should refrain from digging up 6-year old Spanish stories. 6 years! Holy crap! It has been 6 years since I lived in Candelaria! Dios mio, I am old.

There’s so much to see in Tenerife and the rest of the Canary Islands, it’s almost too bad that my parents will be spending most of their vacation in Italy instead of roaming those volcanic wonders. Another time, I suppose.

It’s already one hour later than I planned on sleeping. The monsoon outside is reminding me to take my shower and get into bed!

Tomorrow is going to be grand. I will it to be.

This entry was posted on Saturday, September 24th, 2005 at 5:44 am and is filed under The Sacred and Mundane.
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