I’ve been staying up way past my bedtime. And it isn’t doing anything for me as evidenced by the monster zits on my face that I mentioned last time. My neighbour, Xiao Ping, even said to me with a completely serious face: “You’ve got a big pimple.” Yes, indeedy. Thanks for the info.

It is 1 a.m. now Singers time and where am I? Not in bed! Damn these conflicting vows! I told you, Internet, that I would write more frequently. So here I am. But I also told meself, and some of my health/fitness buddies that I would whip my lardy arse into butt o’ steel. So tomorrow morning, I drag said derriere to the pool for some lane swimming.

When my wonderful Chinese masseuse is not kneading/cracking my back into comfort, she is teaching me to heal myself with exercises. The swimming is part of this regime. I’ll keep you posted on my progress in both flab busting and back healing.

I was about to climb into bed and get my long distance lover to call me, but I had to share this with you:

STAR WAR: THE BACKSTROKE OF THE WEST

This is especially funny to me since Matt, Lisa and I witnessed something similar while riding back from Penang on our Super Nice business class coach. While waiting for other people to go through Singaporean immigration, the driver popped in a dodgy version of Ghost Ship complete with ridiculous double translations. Classically bizarre examples from the special edition of GS include “Tom!” being translated as “Santos!”

Another favourite is “Bon appetit” being subtitled: Knock knock teeth.

At some point, the sound went and we were left with the nonsensical subtitles. The lack of creepy sound effects made the movie more tolerable for me since I am a total wuss when it comes to all horror flicks and also upped the humour factor.

I’m too tired to end with anything witty, so I’ll just tell you this: Today a cute Chinese girl with stick straight “rebonded” hair, perfect eyebrows and a tiny body told me that she loved me while holding my hands. 😛

This entry was posted on Thursday, August 18th, 2005 at 10:26 am and is filed under S'pore.
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